Thursday, May 31, 2012

NOTD: Orly Faint of Heart


I wanted to do a quick mani today. This is Orly Faint of Heart with Sally Hansen Bridal Veil. This is two coats (in the shade) of Faint of Heart with one coat White Veil and coat Seche Vite.


Here is Orly Faint of Heart two coats in more sun (one coat Seche Vite). This is truer to it's actual color. It's a taupey grey. It also seems to have what looks like speckles of black in it. This applied like a normal Orly polish without any problems.


Here's a close up Sally Hansen White Veil. It has small whiteish silverish hex glitter and larger gold hex glitter all in a clear base. I grabbed it on a whim and love it! It's really unique for anything that I have. It applied like a normal glitter but for some reason all the gold glitter went down the middle of the nail! Haha! I didn't mind too badly! :)


Bottle shot of Sally Hansen White Veil.


Macro bottle shot of White Veil.

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Wednesday Reads - Lynn Kurland

 

Introducing a new segment to my blog: Wednesday Reads. This is where I would like to introduce you all to the different books that I love to read!

The first book I am going to introduce you to isn't just one book, it's all the books by my favorite author: Lynn Kurland. (click on her name to be sent to her site). She is a New York Times Bestselling Author.

Lynn Kurland writes a few different series. One series is called The Nine Kingdom Series. To be honest I haven't read these. I love her other two series though: The de Piaget Family Series and The MacLeod Family Series.

The de Piaget Family Series and The MacLeod Family Series, to me, aren't really two series but one that are intertwined and connected. The genre of these books are Romance; some are historical, some are paranormal and some are time travel. But all are closed door romances, which means that what happens in the bedroom is not known to the reader (you are not taken in there), these are pretty clean books.

The majority of her books have a strong woman as her main character that is from modern times. This woman somehow finds herself back in the medieval times by way of a time gate or fairy ring.  Here she usually meets up with a medieval lord and through different challenges they end up falling in love and either staying in the medieval times or coming back to modern times.

Sometimes the books are from the guy's point of view going to the past or coming to the future. And sometimes there are ghosts involved, friendly of course and some are even match makers! :)

These books are really funny, especially when the medieval lord or maiden finds themselves in the future. :)

The de Piaget family is a family that is based at the castle Artane in England. They are based in the medieval times. The MacLeod family is a family based in modern times in a castle in Scotland. But these two families intertwine throughout the years by marriage and by helping each other out (through the mapping of the fairy rings!).

These books are so great that I own each one in these in the two family series and I have read them over and over! I have even ordered her newest one that came out in April! I can't wait until it gets here this week! :) There are two different ways to read these books. One is publication order (the order in which she wrote them) and the other is chronologically by family. (visit the Lynn Kurland link to get the whole list of her books and the different reading orders!).

If you are interested in reading these amazing books you can choose which order to read them in. I obviously read them in publication order.

If you were going to read the de Piaget family chronologically you would begin with Rhys and Gwen's story in Another Chance to Dream. This is a purely historical romance. 
With neither title nor land, Rhys cannot win the hand of Gwennelyn of Segrave, though the two are kindred souls … Rhys, a knight with far too many notions of chivalry for his own good, and Gwen, a lover of minstrel tales, waiting to be swept away. But Gwen is betrothed to another man, and Rhys fears he will lose her forever. Until a surprise offer comes his way – bringing Rhys and Gwen a second chance at love, and another chance to dream.




But if you were going to read the MacLeod family chronologically you would begin with James and Elizabeth's story in A Dance Through Time. This one is a time travel story.

James MacLeod is the most respected – and feared – laird in all of Scotland in 1311. He loves his men like brothers and his land with a passion. He allows no women to cross the threshold of his keep … until his steward brings in a strange woman and sets her down in Jamie’s chair as if she belongs there.
Elizabeth Smith has taken a walk in Gramercy Park in 1996, dozed off on a bench, and woken in fourteenth-century Scotland on Jamie’s land. She’s sure she’s seen him before … in her dreams. She will turn his ordered world upside-down and go where no woman had ever gone before: straight into his heart …

As for my opinion? I would start with A Dance Through Time. The time travel stories are Lynn at her best! You will fall in love with James MacLeod and Elizabeth! Don't get me wrong, Rhys and Gwen and good too but it is their children that begin the time traveling.

I would love to here if any of you have read any of Lynn Kurland's books and what you have thought of them. Also what books are you currently reading right now?


Tuesday, May 29, 2012

11 Questions Tag


It has been a while since my last tag post, this time I'm doing 11 Questions Tag again. I'm tagged by FairyAna.

First the rules:

1. Each person must post 11 things about themselves on their blog.
2. Answer the questions the tagger set for you in their post and create 11 new questions for people you tag to answer.
3. You have to choose 11 people and tell them. No tag backs.

11 things about me:

1. Currently suffering from a nail art block. :(
2. Have been working at Old Navy for three years.
3. Almost done swatching my entire collection.
4. Realize I have too many polishes and a lot of very similar
5. Hoping to create a blog sale soon!
6. I love owls!
7. My favorite place to visit is Disneyland!

(look Disneyland and owls! Perfect!)
8. I love to read (look for tomorrow's post!)
9. Love Indie polishes!
10. I have never been anywhere but the US and Canada.
11. Saw the movie Titanic in the theaters (when it first came out) like 7 times!

11 questions from FairyAna:

1. What nail polish is on your nails right now?
Cult Nails Let Me Fly

2. The last song you heard is?
Meg & Dia: Said and Done

3. What is your favorite thing about blogging?
Talking about things I love and finding out other people love it too!

4. What do you do when you are uninspired about your blog?
Create new segments! haha!

5. If you can choose only one concert to see to the rest of your life, who's concert would it be?
Honestly I don't like concerts. I don't like to watch people sing and live performances are always different than the recordings!

6. Is there any place in the world you wish to see (choose only one) ?
Italy because of the Italian Renaissance

7. Which one do you prefer: book or a movie?
Both. haha! How can one choose between the two!? The both have their own flavor! :)

8. The glass is half full or half empty?
Half full of air and half empty of water. Think about that! ;)

9. Do you think you have enough nail polish?
Absolutely! Too much! But don't tell my other ones that are one there way to me! :)

10. How many bottles of nail polish that you have is untried?
I would saw about half have been actually swatched on my nails. But I have almost swatched my entire collection on fake nails.

11. Favorite makeup brand?
Urban Decay. Because it doesn't bother my allergies!

My questions to you:
1. What's on your nails right now?
2. What is your favorite book?
3. What is your favorite TV show?
4. I you had to choose one polish for the rest of your life what would it be?
5. How many bottles of polish do you have?
6. Your favorite animal?
7. How many languages do you know?
8. Your favorite blog.
9. Favorite place to travel.
10. Your biggest fear.
11. Your favorite quote.

Ok, I'm the type of person that doesn't follow all the rules. I am not tagging anyone, I am giving this to all who wants it! Information should be free and all that jazz! hahahahaha!

Teal Tuesdays - Anything Goes!


This week we decided to let the challenge be what ever you wanted to do as long at it includes teal! So I decided to just do a swatch of a gorgeous dusty teal with silver shimmer! This is two coats of Cult Nails Let Me Fly with one coat of Seche Vite. And wow is it ever gorgeous!


Here's another shot of it in not so direct sun (two coats Let Me Fly and one coat Seche Vite). I love this color and polish! Application was lovely! The formula is a bit thick but that is what made the application nice! It's not too thick, it's just right!


I wanted to show you what one coat looks like (direct sun). It is almost opaque in one coat but you can see some sparse spots specifically on my pointer finger.





Teal Tuesdays was started because teal is unloved and needed its own day of celebration!
Teal is a medium to dark bluish green color of low saturation; a dark cyan.
Open to interpretation, anything green with a hint of blue or blue with a hint of green is welcome here!
Aqua, Turquoise,Tiffany Blue, etc etc...all are welcome - we do not discriminate!
Click the Teal Tuesdays logo on this post or in my sidebar to be taken to the facebook page!

Some of the other blogs participating are:
Cherries Sweets
Colorsplash Nails
Gaga for Nails
Fancy Phalanges 
Gnarly Gnails
Geeky Owl
Mandy's Polish
Nails Beautiqued
No Holos!
Persistently Glittery
Simple-and-Beautiful

Monday, May 28, 2012

Nail Mail Monday!


It's been awhile since I've had so many packages delivered in one day! I was so happy! :)


First up is my Cult Nails order from her second $5 sale! :) I got all the ones I wanted!


(l-r) Hypnotize Me, Let Me Fly, and Enigmatic. I have swatched these all for my swatchsicles and my favorite is Let Me Fly! It is stunning!


Next up is my order from Diamond Cosmetics. (l-r) Matte Smoke (yep a grey matte!), Chainmail Charm (suppose to be a holo, but isn't a really strong one), Talk of Tokyo, and Concrete Jungle (this is the polish that started the whole order!). Funny thing is that while doing my swatchsicles I have come to see that I really do like greens and greys and this purchase confirms it even more! :)


My quick order from Head2Toe for more clear nail tips for my swatchsicles with my first Misa polish in Grey Matters. This is a silvery shimmery grey!


These were not nail mail but what I picked up from Sallys this weekend! The Finger Paints were clearanced so they were an extra 50% off! $1.62 each for Circus Peanuts and Choco Mint! And then I asked the girl working if they had the new Orly Glam FX line in. They did in the back! She brought them out and I fell in love with Mermaid Tale.


Macro bottle shot of Orly Mermaid Tale. Stunning!!!!

Sunday, May 27, 2012

A Bit of Geekery Goodness!

So I have this loathing for a certain LMFAO song: I'm Sexy and I Know It. I hate this song with a passion.

But what happens when you geek it out and make it about Star Trek?



You are all most welcome. :)

How Many Can You Bold

I saw this over at The Polished Pixie and figured it would be fun to do! :)

1. Started your own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sang a solo
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightening storm
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
 27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught yourself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten Caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone
78. Been a passenger on a motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Kissed a stranger at midnight on New Year’s Eve
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club
93. Got a tattoo
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake (ew no! It's stinky and covered in bugs! But I have been to it!)
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee

Friday, May 25, 2012

TGIF: Thank Goodness, Indie Friday - Glix


Welcome to another installment of TGIF: Thank Goodness, Indy Indie Friday! Today is brought to you Glitrix, an amazing etsy store that sells gorgeous line frankens called Glix. Frankens are, in the words of Glitrix "a personalized mixture and creating your own polish from your stash of nail polish can be fun and addicting. The possibilities are pretty much endless".

This post features two polishes and is picture heavy! :)


First up is Midnight Booze. This is one coat. If I had glooped a bit more on the brush it would have been completely opaque in this one coat! How awesome is that! But with this coat I had a few sparse areas. This is direct sun.


This polish is an amazing indigo based polish with what Glitrix describes as "several different glitters". I could spot micro gold glitter, micro blue glitter, small gold hex and small lilac hex glitter. It is stunning! The application wasn't bad either. It applied like normal glitter and wasn't too fussy! The glitter settled during shipping but I turned it on it's side to have the glitter spread through out and seemed to work because I had glitter with each brush stroke.


Check out the cute bottles! Bah! Stinkin' cute! These are 0.5 ml. She also sells these cute star bottles empty too for those who are into making their own polishes!


Macro bottle shot. Look at that glitter! Gorgeous! It is such a classy polish! I love it!


Here is two coats of Midnight Booze. Like I said, could have been a one coater but two coats makes it a more deeper/richer color and the gold just pops! Gorgeous!


Here is another shot/angle of Midnight Booze using two coats. Stunning and interesting as I don't believe I have anything like it in my stash (and I am currently swatching it so I would know! haha!).


This, gorgeous unique polish is Barbarella. And I think I am in love! This is one coat and as you can see it is still sheer.


Here is Barbarella in direct sun. A lime green polish with what Glitrix describes as "several different glitters". I could spot salmon pink micro glitter and small salmon pink hex glitter. The pink looks orange in some lights and pink in others so I deem it salmon pink!? Lime green and salmon pink? WIN! This polish literally made my jaw drop. This is so unique I love it!


Cute bottle shot! Again these polishes are 5ml. And I think I am going to need a back up of this one!


Macro bottle shot. Squee! Look at that! This is such a fun pop of color!


Here is Barbarella using two coats. Notice that the hex glitter is sparse, that's alright because it's sparse in the bottle, it is not an application problem. I love that it's sparse it makes it more fun! The formula for this polish was wonderful and applied without any problems!


Two coats in direct sun. Just look. How could you not like this one? Granted, this color may not be for everyone but I love colors like this! :)


Bah! My right hand! (It is so hard to take a picture of my right hand!) I wanted to show you want one coat of Barbarella looks like (in direct sun) layered over another polish (Finger Paints Sexy Sundress). Yep, that is what this is. Now I can conserve the polish and make it last longer!


One coat layered over Finger Paints Sexy Sundress. When I stare at both hands together, my left hand (two coats of Barbarella) is a more deeper lime. Whereas the right hand (one coat layered over Finger Paints) is a brighter lime. And look, my pointer didn't get any hex glitter, but I'm alright with that because there is a ton of the pink micro glitter on it! :)

This line of frankens Glix by Glitrix is awesome! 5ml cute star shaped bottles for $6.00 and no shipping and handling! You better all go and visit and buy some because you will not be disappointed!I didn't have problems with either of these polishes and thought that they were great with great coverage and the glitter applied evenly enough! :)

*EDIT: I have worn Barbarella for three days now with a coat of Seche Vite and I have minimal tip wear and this was even one day of working on unloading a truck (which usually wrecks my nails!)!


Here is the underwear for the Barbarella. This is Finger Paints Sexy Sundress. Such a perfect color for Barbarella! But the Finger Paints formula was gloopy and streaky as you can see; but I knew I was going to cover it so I wasn't too worried.

Thursday, May 24, 2012

The Annular Solar Eclipse

First, I want to thank everyone for their kind and encouraging words for my Tuesday post. It has really meant a lot to me, reading those comments. So thank you, from the bottom of my heart.

So on Sunday, May 21 2012 there was an event that happened. It was the Annular Solar Eclipse! How cool is that!? An eclipse happens when the moon comes between the sun and the earth.

According to Wikipedia, an annular eclipse:

"occurs when the Sun and Moon are exactly in line, but the apparent size of the Moon is smaller than that of the Sun. Hence the Sun appears as a very bright ring, or annulus, surrounding the outline of the Moon. The next annular eclipse is on May 10, 2013"
So I put it in my phone to attempt to take pictures of this event. And I think I got some good ones! What we (my dad and I) did was used binoculars. We turned them so that the part you look through was what was closest to the paper and the end of the binoculars was what the sun shone through. Would you like to see some pictures?


So this is the beginning of the eclipse. You can barely start to see the moon making it's way in.


Further into the eclipse.


Haha! Why yes, that is the shadow of my head. We aimed the eclipse image on the paper into a shadow to make it show up better. :)


Look how bright it is even on paper! It is glowing!


And the toenail of the eclipse! haha! This was as much as we could see of it before it sank behind some houses next to us. (the extra white in the photo is where the shadow ended because by now the angle of the sun was harder to catch the eclipse with).

This was such an interesting event! I'm so glad I got to witness it and photograph it!

Did any of you witness this event?

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Nail Mail from Win at Red Hair and Black Nail Polish

I won Red Hair and Black Nail Polish's 1st Blogiversary Giveaway! I can't believe I won! It's an awesome prize package, check it out!


Isn't this just one of the most generous giveaways ever! :)


5 sets of nail stickers! I rarely use mine that I have because I don't want to run out. Well, now I can use them to my heart's content! I love putting them on my toes! :) I've never tried the tip kind before, kinda excited! :)


(l-r): Catrice Browno Mars (I have been wanting this one!!), Catrice Blue Cara Ciao (such a fun bright summery blue!), and Catrice King of Greens (a stunning green with a shimmer!).


(l-r): Essence Time for Romance (have seen swatches for this and have been lemming it!), Essence Circus Confetti (yes! More jelly sammich glitter!!!!!), and Essence Blue Addicted (this is such a stunning polish!).


My first ever Flormars! (l-r): Flormar U08 (Blue/Purple duochrome, gorgeous!) and Flormar U06 (Pink/Purple duochrome or maybe just glitter? Not sure but wow it is gorgeous!) and my second ever Miss Sporty Sparkle Touch Top Coat. This is like the kid sister to the NYC Starry Silver Glitter that I used on Saturday! Clear base with silver, blue, and pink/lilac glitters! Gorgeous!


Macro bottle shot of the Flormars! Aren't they pretty! :)


And last but not least the yummy goodies she sent me! Mmmm! I love Kinder chocolate and it reminds me of my childhood growing up in Canada! Sadly these were a bit smooshy (stupid Arizona heat!) but an hour in the fridge and voila! Mmmmmm! These were yummy! I still have a few Kinders left (trying to slowly eat them) but the other chocolate is all gone! Thank you!

Please go check out Theodora's blog Red Hair and Black Nail Polish. Her pictures are lovely! And she has wonderful nail art and tutorials!

Thank you so much Theodora! I love all my pretties! And the chocolate (now that it has solidified again!) was yummy!

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Some Days Just Don't Turn Out As Planned

Today's post was suppose to be Teal Tuesday using stars but I didn't couldn't get around to it this week. I don't often write about personal things on my blog but I thought I should this time as it might effect somethings down the road.

Today (I am writing this Monday night), hasn't been a good day. I have been in bed all day with a anxiety/panic attack. Mine are not the usual ones where I have a thought that has taken over and stops me from doing anything. Mine are more of a feeling that boils inside until it erupts and renders me useless. I have no thoughts during them, no sense of pending doom. I am just unable to function and my brain is like the static on the tv.

I hate these attacks. Most times I can pinpoint (after the fact) why they occurred, school stress, loud noises, and sometimes even crowded places (but not always). But this is the first time I have woken up in a full fledged attack. I hate it.

So no, I didn't do my nails today. Heck, I didn't even shower today! My swatchsicles are staring at me from across the room and I won't get to them today either. And I feel guilty. And I hate that too.

These anxiety/panic attacks on this level are new to me within the past 7 months (in which they have almost been constant). See, I have depression. I've had it since I was about 16 (I'm now 31). I've accepted my depression, don't love it, but if this is my trial in life then I am content with it as long as I don't get anything else!

About ten years ago I was diagnosed with Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD). I always thought calling it SAD was kind of funny. But this is a form of severe depression where there is a mood change that occurs during the change of seasons. Mine is winter, less sun (hence the move to Arizona). When October comes around I feel my depression worsen and I can usually fight it from getting too bad. But not this past October. This past October I experienced one of my worst episodes that I have had in over ten years. I was bed ridden for days, forcing myself to go to work. It has been the hardest thing I have ever had to do.

Fast forward to now. I am still in what I like to call my funk, anxiety/panic attacks and all. Usually this would be gone by now. But the hold that this funk has over me has left me unable to get out. I am still down in my deep dark well with the only light shinning above me way out of reach.

I do know that even though some days (like now) are the darkest; there is always a light, that there is always hope, that I will reach the top of my well and get out. I need to remember the good days, because those always outweigh the bad. I know I will always have depression as it is a chemical imbalance that I have. And I know that I will always be on medication, which I am fine with as it keeps me with my loved ones. My depression makes me who I am. And I believe I am stronger because of it.

This post went into further detail than I had planned. But what I have come to find out in the polish world is that I am not alone in this. There are many other wonderful ladies who suffer this silent pain as I do. Polish brings the color back into our world if only for a day or two. It is nice to know that I am not alone even when I feel that I am, utterly alone.

So I have decided that there may be some times that I don't post everyday, because sometimes trying to keep up has brought on these attacks and I can't do that anymore. So I may miss a few days here and there because I need me time and I don't want to feel guilty about it. But I will always try my best to post.

I am also thinking of adding different types of posts and not just manis. I have other collections that I would love to show you ladies (that would give you more insight into me), like my massive amounts of necklaces or journals or books (big reader here) or quotes. I'm just not sure that these would be things that interest you, the reader.

So if any of those would be interested in those other types of posts, let me know and I could start that up too. And thank you for those who stayed through this rather lengthy post, probably my longest post yet! :)

If you would like to read an very interesting blog post that explains a lot of what I am feeling please read: The Crumpet Depression - Me and My Shadow. For those who don't suffer from depression, this gives you some insight on what those who suffer from it feel like.

Monday, May 21, 2012

Monkey See Monkey Do Mondays: Eek! Faces


Monkey See Monkey Do Mondays are where we re-create manis from different blogs or pictures we have "pinned" on Pinterest, and link back to the original blogger!

This week I decided to copy Emma's mani over at Manicurity: Eek! Faces. I thought these were so stinkin' cute! I used Nicole by OPI Wild Blue Yonder - Matte as my base. This is a lovely matte that almost has a suede like finish. I used Wet n' Wild Black Creme and Color Club French tip for the faces.

These little faces are so fun and easy! I want to do them again during Halloween! :)



Here is a photo of Emma's man from Manicurity. (click the title or the picture to be sent to her blog and post).

Would you like to join Monkey See Monkey Do Mondays? Click the image below or the one on my side bar.



Check out the ladies that participated in this Monkey See Monkey Do!



And don't forget to check out all the other ladies who are participating!

Amber Did It!
Angelina's Nails & More 
A Polish Addiction
The Clockwise Nail Polish 
The Crumpet
Dressed Up Digits
Enigmatic Rambles
Erin's Beauty Bumbles
Esta Cerrada la Drogueria
Fancy Phalanges
Fanning the Fumes
Follow The Yellow Polish Road
Geeky Owl
Gnarly Gnails
Jens Painted Tips
Kawaiinize Your World
LeSamowen: Life, Love, and Nail Polish
Macabre Manicures
The Manicured Monkey
Manicurity
Maquiclub Girl
The (mis)Adventures of a Wanna Be Martha
Nails and Vanities
Nail Wish
Nailpolish is My Crack 
Never Naked Nails
PishPosh and Polish
Polish Crazed
Polish Lover
Polish My Mind
Tales of Knit and Nails
Toxic Vanity